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Is it Saturday yet? I really need to just like get completely drunk off my ass. Totally wasted. I can't deal with my fucking shithole of a life anymore. I can't fucking handle anything anymore. I just want to curl up in a ball and like sleep forever. I have too much to do and no time to do it, actually not true... I have time, I just suck at making anything of it, similarly as to how I suck at everything else in my life. I'm still behind in all my classes. I still suck at marching band. I'm broke now (mostly because I blew $210 at PacSun today, because I tend to shop when I'm deep in self-loathing depression). Now my mom is ignoring me, which has it's benefits... I'd rather she just never came home, because then at least she wouldn't be using my computer which is the most annoying thing in the fucking world. Worst of all, I completely fucked up my relationship with Jeff. I'm an idiot and a bitch like that, and now I hate myself more than ever, and I feel more alone than I've ever felt in my entire life. I'd say that things can't get much worse from here, but I know they can and I'm sure they will. If the worst is yet to come, then I'd rather not be here for it...



( a very loud beep — speeeeeaaaakkkkk )
Sep. 20th, 2002 02:31 pm (UTC)
I've got a bit of experience and perspective on the distance thing, so if you want to talk about it or advice or something, let me know .
( a very loud beep — speeeeeaaaakkkkk )
nurse. leo. attention whore. punk rock princess. flexitarian. space case. deltasig. browncoat. fangirl. professional bridesmaid. lover. geek. only child. dreamer. former market researcher. aerialist. uconn husky. internet addict. twentysomething. enfp/j. crazy cat lady. gryffindor. bohemian. new england gangsta. democrat. narcissist. daughter. friend.

just me.

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